Keeping a small child in bed for a month, especially a small JAMIE CALKIN child is next to impossible. The first few days were a novelty, he was easy to entertain.
By the end of the first week he was done being still. He felt better physically so why wouldn't he get up and live? That is what it seemed to me.
I've been closing my shop on Saturday's until Jamie is able to get up and around again. Blake, Red, and I have been sharing the job of keeping Jamie entertained. He does sleep well most nights so it's nice that we don't have to watch him during the night most nights.
When I go out Friday after work and stay until Sunday evening Blake and Red have set up a cot in Jamie's room so that I can sleep there by him. He seems to enjoy having me close to him, and I LOVE being there with our boys.
I hope someday....sigh...someday that Blake will marry me, and let me be a full-time Mom to these beautiful boys. I'm afraid to even write those words in my journal. I'm not superstitious, ok maybe a little bit superstitious. I don't even want to run the risk of saying those words. I don't even want to take the chance that manifesting the ideas will stop it from happening.
I'm so exhausted by the time I get home to my bed on Sunday. I usually get home about eight at night. I go straight to bed. I get up very early on Monday morning to try and keep my business going during this tough time.
Last Saturday night I was having a hard time getting Jamie to go to sleep. I walked across the room to calm myself. I was so tired that I was being irritable with Jamie, and that didn't help anything.
With my back still turned to Jamie I suddenly heard him chattering. It wasn't his regular chattering but not really talking to someone else. It was as though he were being asked questions and he was answering.
I turned and had to sit on my cot I was so startled. There was a beautiful woman standing next to Jamie. The strange thing was that I could somehow see through this beautiful woman to the wall. She glided to me. It did not seem as though she walked. She was several inches above the ground when she came to my side.
I was shaking all over. This being was not earthly. I didn't know what she was. I pinched myself, and it hurt. I knew that I was awake, but what was this woman?
"Sarah," she said. "My name is Sarah Calkin. I was Blake's second wife, Jamie's Mother by blood and Eric's Mother by love. I don't get the chance to be seen very often. The Great Spirit teaches faith by keeping the spiritual part of life separate from the mortal part of life. If you could see all the spirits, like your Mother, Father, brothers, and Sister-in law you would know and you wouldn't need faith."
I jumped to my feet in shock. "How do you know about my family? They are still watching over you Celeste. They love you and will stay close to the end of your life. Then you will join them in the spiritual realm."
I stepped forward quickly and tried to touch the apparition. Sarah shot upwards until I couldn't reach her. Then she shot back down just as quickly. You should not try to touch me. You will feel nothing. A spirit can't be quantified by a mortal body. You can see me, and hear me but you can't touch me. Our spirits are made of a very different type of matter."
"My time is almost done Celeste. I was allowed to come to thank you. Thank you for watching over Jamie, Eric, Blake, and Red. I love all of them forever."
"Don't give up on Blake Celeste. He loves you." It seemed really strange to me to have a ghost telling me of Blake's love. It was even stranger that the ghost was his former wife.
"Blake will never be ready to marry again. He has told me that again, and again," I told Sarah.
"Please be patient. Blake needs time to heal. You are the perfect wife for him. He needs someone to love and to be loved by on this earth. In Heaven...well the lucky man will have three women that loved him on earth and still love him in Heaven. We'll figure things out then, right?" Sarah smiled at me, and I found myself smiling back.
And then.....the sunshine was pouring in the window and I was awakening. I have no memory of Sarah leaving. I think that I must have fallen asleep and dreamed all of that. I must have, right? Except Jamie said this morning, "Sawah?"
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